I apologize in advance, but it's time to talk a little NBA hoops. In the wake of Orlando's game-four finals collapse, in which the simple administration of a non-shooting foul to Los Angeles' Derek Fisher in the game's waning moments would have secured a Magic victory (and a 2-2 series tie), I'd like to offer up my retribution to the inevitable barrage of "this championship cements Kobe as the best player in the NBA" sentiments.
Because as alluring as Kobe Bryant can be as a silky smooth, unstoppable offensive force, he is not the game's best player, nor is he even remotely close. That honor falls to a native son of the great Midwest...LeBron James of the recently-eliminated Cavaliers. Take a look at select statistics for each players' past season:
James: 31.76 PER, 59.1 TS%, 30.2 P/40, 8.0 R/40, 7.7 A/40
LeBron tops Kobe in every single category, positively annihilating him in a head-to-head PER comparison (PER = Player Efficiency Rating [Hollinger], a measure of a player's per-minute productivity). Now, to be clear, Kobe is a better "natural" shooter than LBJ, both on the perimeter and at the free-throw line. However, LeBron's transcendent penetrating prowess and inside-shot-making ability has lifted him to a higher true-shooting percentage than Kobe (TOTAL [2FG+3FG+FT] MAKES/ TOTAL ATTEMPTS)...by more-than three full percentage points. This relatively small disparity does not properly reflect the chasm that existed between the two players' overall offensive contributions in 2008-09. Shooting, by itself, is obviously a poor quantification of overall offensive production; LeBron's 7.7 assists per 40 minutes are crystal clear proof of his indisputable superiority as a facilitator (a full 2.3 assists more than Bryant averaged given the same floor-time), and thus as a complete offensive force. Additionally, there is no argument to be made about each players' respective teammates 'coloring' these statistics; Kobe's cast of Gasol, Odom, Ariza, Fisher, Bynum, Walton and Vuyacic is at least as proficient as James' posse of Williams, West, Ilgauskas, Varejau, Smith, Szczerbiak and Gibson, and after the latter's disappearing act in the Eastern Conference Finals against Orlando, the Lakers contingent makes a convincing case for being definitively better. Returning to a direct comparison of Nike's obnoxious puppet personas, how about rebounding disparity? Again, there is no comparison; James' 6'9" frame clearly constitutes an advantage over the Kobe's 6'6" model (a listed height, and likely a fabricated one, to Kobe's credit as a rebounder). LeBron's athleticism constitutes perhaps the most impressive size/strength/speed combination that I have ever seen on a basketball court: imagine Karl Malone with sprinter's speed and an incredible vertical. Kobe used to have the ability to inspire a similar sense of awe with pure explosiveness and fluidity (remember that reverse dunk at MSG?), but needless to say he has lost a step or two at age thirty.
To those of you who would rather ignore these statistical realities, and delve instead into the ethereal, whimsical realm of gastrointestinal premonition, I'll save you the breath and say everything you were thinking. Additionally, I'll save myself the difficulty of attempting to turn these dubious intuitions into coherent arguments, and simply express them in a stream-of-consciousness buzzword parade.
"Clutch...closer...ball in hands at end of game...Black Mamba...ice water...fiery competitiveness...(contrived) scowling...Eagle County...maritime abortion...Phil Donahue"
In all fairness to Kobe, the man is a stone-cold killer during the final minutes of the game, and seems to live to take high-pressure shots (including, but not limited to "money shots," which Bryant admitted to Eagle County investigators, is "[his] thing"). However, LeBron is amassing an impressive late-game resume of his own, including a game winning, fall-away three pointer at the end of game two versus the Magic, and a stretch of either scoring or assisting on his team's final 32 points in game five of the same series. A series in which he averaged 38.5 PPG, 8.3 RPG and 8.0 APG, while definitively demonstrating that he was the most disruptive defensive force outside of the painted area (where, to be fair, Dwight Howard basically just nests, while LeBron must roam around and run Cleveland's attack on both ends, as well as on fast breaks). All in all, whatever heroics Bryant may have performed over the course of his career, they are not nearly enough to outweigh LeBron's contributions as a distributor, rebounder and defender of the 1-4 positions.
One additional thought--a transition of sorts before we turn our attention back to the diamond. Kobe Bryant, a privileged child raised in Italy, fluent in several languages, and certainly too intelligent, worldly and narcissistic to fit in with many of his teammates, has the most carefully constructed pubic image in all of sports, trumping even that of Alex Rodriguez. Each man has had hiccups lately (namely A-Rod's juicing scandal and Kobe's Katelyn Faber incident), nevertheless, they are cut from the same cloth. Each acts as if the camera were perpetually affixed on them, and them alone (which, as a rule-of-thumb, is fairly accurate). Recently however, this has manifested itself in a rather offsetting way for Bryant: his newly trademarked scowl. I remember vividly the first time I saw it, immediately thinking to myself, "Wow, I bet he actually thinks that will become the 'stick-your-tongue-out-while-driving-the-lane' (MJ) for a new generation...how terribly misguided." Kobe must have a really tough time relating to his black teammates; I'd bet most anything that his best friend on the team is Pau Gasol, and that everyone darker than Sasha Vuyacic regularly comments (behind his back) on how big a phony he is. Think "A-Fraud," only Kobe is much, much smarter than Rodriguez, who can't seem to get out of his own way. "Black Mamba?" You think it's a coincidence that Kobe gave himself a nickname that includes both the word "black" and the connotation that he hails from Africa? I don't. I enjoy watching Kobe play, but I would enjoy it more if I didn't feel like he was perpetually trying to pull one over on me; I can't shake the feeling that the man is more Michael Pietrus than Steven Jackson. Which is an overwhelmingly good thing, stop trying to cover it up!
Christ, I was bored just writing that, I hope none of you expect me to edit it. I may never figure out why I remain an NBA fan (I just can't quit you, KG). Regardless, and in the interest of full disclosure, I wrote most of this while watching the Twins play in Wrigley for the first time since 2001. Back to baseball next post, I promise.
