We at Minnfarction have stumbled upon the most garishly ornate uniforms in the history of sport. They belong to the Northland College Lumberjacks cross country team, and boy are they doosies. ("What if we combined the look of the chintziest apron imaginable with a 'ROAD WORK AHEAD' sign?"...but I digress.) Before we begin the festivities, a sole commendation is in order: the blue shorts do complement both the orange uniform top and the soulless gingerness quite well. All pics that follow were taken without the permission of the subjects (to report a violation, click here):
The "Dayrunner"
We have a playing field as ugly as our uniforms. We must be Boise State.
As for the plaid...ugh. Being as Northland is located in Ashland, WI, I can only surmise that they were hedging against their athletes getting picked off by deer hunters. If you can think of another reason, we're all ears (minnfarction@gmail.com). While this may be forgivable as piping--the North Carolina Tar Heels, after all, have employed powder blue argyle side panels for years...
...Northland decided to make their's more, uh, conspicuous. Spare the orange breast plate, the entire [tank] top is orange plaid, even the back. And the piping sucks too. (Is it even "piping" when it encompasses half the fabric of the short?)
Somewhere, Richard Simmons is asphyxiating on his own vomit.
All this is quite unfortunate, especially considering their website has pictures of the boys sporting much more tasteful plain white tops, with the word "Northland" displayed humbly across the chest. Sometimes, less really is more. That's enough from us--Paul Lukas has been made aware of the situation. It's in God's hands now.
